Since the beginning of time, women have been giving their sexual power away. We learn early in life that our sexuality is something that men covet. Our sexuality is used against us. We have experienced abuse and rape at the hands of others, many whom we have loved and trusted.
Even if you are a woman who has not been sexually abused or raped, you may still have a subconscious belief that your sexuality will somehow bring you what you want. You may trade your body for the promise of love, money, or security. When you do this, you end up betraying yourself. Misuse of your own sexuality is misuse of your own power and such “self abuse” can have some pretty dark consequences.
We are living in a society that is slowly waking up and as we, as women, wake up to higher levels of awareness, we realize that we have to change our thinking around our sexuality. We don’t owe anyone! Our bodies are sacred!
Even if we are in a relationship or married, we are not obligated to share our sexuality with our partner. Sexuality between two people must be mutually agreed upon. There are many circumstances that must be factored in before sharing your feminine power.
Notice how I used the words “feminine power?” Well, your femininity is your power! You must learn how to take very good care of this aspect of yourself. When you give away your sexuality, you give away your power, if not given freely under circumstances where your self-integrity is completely in check.
A lot of my clients tell me “I really love sex,” and will stay with a partner because the sex is good. But often the partners my clients are with are abusive, demeaning, degrading, and dishonoring of the feminine. If you are not being honored sexually, you will suffer, even if you are unconscious of how you are really feeling about it.
If you are someone who is staying in a relationship for the sex, even if you are being mistreated by your partner, you may want to seek counseling and explore this on a deeper level. You may not have realized that you are giving your feminine power away and the result is a feeling of powerlessness.
When you choose to have sex with someone you have just met or don’t know well, you are also taking a major risk with your feminine power. Once again, this is your power! It belongs to you. Nobody has the right to it. Nobody should ever take it from you and even if you are in a relationship, you don’t owe your partner your feminine power. It is a gift that you give, when it feels right to you. You don’t give it under obligation, or fear or any other reason.
Sharing your feminine power should feel empowering, not disempowering. If it feels disempowering then something is wrong.
Be very careful not to blame yourself or allow yourself to be manipulated. Don’t be fooled by someone calling you frigid, or some other buzz word that makes you feel like something is wrong with you if you don’t “give in.” It is more likely there is something right with you. You are taking care of yourself. You are listening to your own body. You are making a conscious choice not to share your sacred femininity with someone who is not coming from love, respect and honor. Good for you!
Although I am writing this article mostly for women, there is a piece in this for men too. First of all, men also need to respect their sacred sexuality. Even though it is the masculine nature to pro-create, things have changed a lot with the evolution of humanity. We no longer need to populate the earth. The earth is plentifully populated.
Men who are evolving need to also protect their sexual energies, by being very careful about who they get sexually involved with, and not allow women to sexually manipulate them. Men also need to respect the sacred feminine and realize that sexual union is a gift, not an expectation. That door swings both ways.
With men, their masculine power is actually increased with less sex, not more. They become more potent, spiritually connected and “in their power” when they are mindful of their sexual energy and not spend it like cash in their pocket.
There is a lot of focus, out in the world on Tantra and Sacred Sexuality. Keep in mind that Tantra is often misused under the guise of spirituality. Many Tantric groups are nothing more than sophisticated sexual cults or orgies that do a lot more harm than good. Tantra is more about energy then sexuality. To practice “true Tantra” is to practice using your sexual energy in a powerful way. This can be practiced alone or with a loving partner.
Polyamory is another practice that can be very harmful for many people, especially emotionally sensitive types. If you are emotionally sensitive you need to be very mindful of your sensitivity and take care of this aspect of yourself, just as you want to take good care of your sacred sexuality. Your sensitive nature is beautiful and needs to be protected.
When you get too many energies co-mingling sexually, it can be very difficult for a highly sensitive individual as he/she takes on the energies of the others involved. Sexual energy is very powerful, but can also be very messy and distorted, if not protected and used respectfully.
Having one partner is challenging enough. Having more than one sexual partner is either for those who are commitment phobic or for those who don’t easily emotionally attach to others. It is a path of choice and I’m not putting that path down, but I have had clients who have walked this path and were very damaged by it, and so I give words of wisdom, to be mindful of your choices.
Healing the Split Resulting From Sexual Trauma
If you have experienced any kind of sexual abuse in your history, you will need to be especially careful with your sexual energies. You have had your power taken from you and this can cause severe trauma.
I am a Quantum Healing Hypnosis Practitioner and in our sessions, we contact the “Higher Self” or “Subconscious” aspect of the client and speak to this aspect.
I was recently watching a video of one of these Quantum Healing Sessions that was posted on the practitioner forum, and a woman, who was sexually molested, was told by her “higher self” that the molestation caused a “split” between her masculine and feminine selves.
We all have both masculine and feminine energies within us, but if we cut off from one or the other it results in a lack of balance and even the inability to have healthy relationships with the opposite sex, or even the same sex. The higher self of this woman explained the importance of taking care of your sacred feminine energy. She said “it is yours alone and doesn’t belong to anyone else.”
I will include a link to the video below, as it was posted on Youtube as a healing tool for others who have experienced sexual abuse. This video also shows the power of Quantum Healing Hypnosis to heal splits like this.
Although Quantum Healing Hypnosis is trademarked and can only be done in person, I do a form of it over the phone or Skype that is quite successful. Contact me for more information.
