The Path Back to Self Newsletter
Embracing All That You Are!
October 14, 2008
New Tele-Support Group Beginning!
Did you miss the last introductory call? You Get Another Chance!
Mark Your Calendars for October 22nd 7pm PST. We are doing it again!
If you’ve already registered you will receive a notification. If you haven’t you can register here.
It is my intention for the weekly tele-support empowerment group to help each one of you see the divine truth of who you are and perhaps this is something we can all do for each other. I loved seeing the women who were on the last call jump in and offer each other support and validation. I loved seeing one woman who just a short while ago was at the bottom of the barrel; share her success with a woman who was still there. It was through this sharing that she could realize how far she has really come and the one who was scraping the bottom could see the hope and promise of getting better.
To learn more please visit: http://www.narcissismfree.com/live-tele-support.php and be sure to sign up for the free informational tele-conference on October 22th.
My Wings Were Never Broken!
The surest way out of pain is to walk through it, not avoid it, go around it, over it or stand behind it waiting for it to go away. We have to have the courage to walk right on through. We have to be willing to feel it! To be with it and allow the pain to be a part of our experience.
I was listening to a conference call yesterday with Meg Blackburn and she said something that really resonated with what I have learned on my journey.
We believe we are broken and need to be healed The only thing we have to heal is our perspective of ourselves.
A few months ago I started writing my book called “My Wings Were Never Broken.” Through my experience with narcissistic abuse I came to realize that I somehow allowed my abuser to cast me into the role of someone who was broken. My ex said to me “I am honored to be able to help an Angel with a broken wing learn to fly again!” Wow! What a powerful disempowerment.
So in my healing journey I came to realize that I was never broken! It was only that I believed I was. The only thing that had to change was my perception of myself! And this is now what I am absolutely committed to helping others see. If you peel away the illusion you have been living under you will come to see that you are not at all what the abuse led you to believe about yourself. This is the lie! The truth is that you are beautiful, talented, worthy, capable, smart, and for many of you, very successful in what you do. Initially this is the magnet! This is what draws in the predator, who wants to associate with people like you, because it makes him look good.
Where does it all change? When he begins feeling intimidated by your strength, your beauty and your power and sets out to put you in your place, way below him. (For you men, just replace the he with a she.) Through this process of slow manipulation we come to see ourselves as less than. We come to believe we are unworthy! Perhaps it triggers in us a very deep seated self-loathing or shame; the original sin we tend to come into this life with or develop in early childhood. But also we have to consider that we are empathically absorbing the dark emotions of the narcissist in our lives who have moved into our psychic energy field and set up residence there. We believe we are feeling our own dark emotions, but more accurately we are feeling the emotions of the narcissist.
When we are at the absolute bottom of the barrel emotionally, we are still seeing ourselves through his eyes. We are seeing the warped, distorted projections that have absolutely nothing to do with who we are. But when we begin to get better, we begin to rise above the distortion and see more and more of the truth. Yet it is very difficult to rise above the distortions when we are still living in the Narcissistic reality. This is why it is important to completely disengage from his reality and plug back into our own. And…for a while, when our reality is really shaky and we aren’t sure who we are anymore, we can count on others, who understand, to help us rise above and see ourselves in a much brighter light.
Don't try and do it alone. Get the help you need and deserve!
My Conversation with a Narcissist
One of the things I’m finally learning to get comfortable with is my humanness. I am learning to make mistakes and be O.K. with it. I no longer expect perfection of myself. And because of this I am taking many more risks in my life, which include hosting two radio shows, putting out my E-books, audio programs and support groups as well as allowing my music further into the public eye or ear.
This week I interviewed Sam Vaknin. He was in Skopje, Macedonia and I was in Spokane, Washington, USA. I purchased a calling card to make the call with minimal charges, but it seems everything went wrong. When I copied his number to call, I copied his mobile number rather than his landline, and unbeknownst to me it is much more costly to call a cell phone overseas than a landline. So I dialed into my show ten minutes early and once connected I flashed into three-way calling and called the calling card number and then Sam’s number. Well the recorded voice came on and told me I only had 37 minutes for the call. I’m thinking “Wait, the show is an hour!” So with time ticking away I hung up the phone and tried to find the Website where I purchased the calling card so I could add time.
Well by this time I am starting to get nervous, thinking it wasn’t going to happen. I can’t find the right link to click on to purchase more time and I’m not thinking straight, so I find a customer service number and call them. I sit on hold for a good minute while trying to formulate a game plan in my head. Then the operator comes on and guides me through the process of adding yet another ten dollars to my calling card. But then…I can’t find my purse with my credit card number so I’m running all over my house with my headset on looking for my purse. Finally I find it right next to me at my desk and nervously fumble through my wallet looking for a card. I try to keep my voice steady as I ramble off the numbers hoping I will make it in time. She tells me the time is available immediately so I call back into my show, enter my pin number, flash back to three-way calling, call the calling card number and dial Sam. This time it goes through and I get Sam on the phone. He tells me “you’ve called my mobile number, wouldn’t it be better if you call the landline?”
“Oh Crap!” I’m thinking! “O,K.” I said “I’ll call you right back. So I flash out and call the calling card number again and then his land line and the call doesn’t go through. By this time my show is starting and I realize I have to at least check in with my listeners and let them know I am still trying to get Sam on the show. So I flash into my show and have no idea what I’m going to do at this point. I welcome everybody to the show and then get this thought to play a piece of music while I go and try to get Sam on the line again. I have no idea if I will be successful, but have nothing to lose, so I leave the listeners with “Dance of Angels” and off I go again to flash into three-way, dial up the calling card number, the pin, and Sam’s landline number. Once again the call doesn’t go through. So I flash back into my show, back to three-way calling and call the calling card number, the pin and Sam’s Mobile number where I finally get him. I tell him the show is already underway and we would be going live right away and he was a real trooper about it.
So just to give you an idea of what it took to bring Sam Vaknin to my radio show. And…I really wasn’t sure how it was going to go with a title like “Conversations with a Narcissist. “ For a narcissist I think he was pretty well behaved.” And…many narcissists are very brilliant, well mannered in public and good speakers. Meanwhile I’m thinking “If I upset the apple cart by disagreeing or offering a different opinion on something I am likely to get slammed on my radio show, so I best keep it simple and give Sam the spotlight. After all if I have learned anything in my experience with narcissism it is “Don’t argue with a narcissist!”
You can listen to this interview live by visiting Kaleah’s Website at:
www.narcissismfree.com/radio-shows.php.
Counseling and Intuitive Readings Special Price Offer!
My experience with Holistic Counseling, Psychic and Intuitive Readings and Clinical Hypnotherapy dates back to 1988 when I opened my first practice in Bellingham, Washington focusing on behavior changes and transforming lives. I knew back then my passion was to work with people on this level and my choice was to follow this alternative path rather than to become licensed as a psychotherapist. I suppose it is because hypnotherapy is what I attribute to the cure for my eating disorder in my youth. It was so much more effective than "traditional talk therapy" for me.
Although my work with people recovering from narcissistic abuse involves a lot of "talking" I do weave in so much of what I've learned over the years to help my clients move forward, beyond the abuse. Being that I am highly intuitive I always say what I sense and feel about any particular situation. And...I also find that most people who come to me have a pretty strong ability to intuitit what is happening in thier own lives, they simply haven't learned to trust themselves.
My latest tool is using powerful shamanic techniques that I've learned over the years from various teachers. Shamanism is really a spiritual term used to define the process of going deep into the unconscious of one's psyche and working with the various blocks, energy chords, missing soul pieces and any area where one's psychic energy is being drained or leaking out. This is commonly found amongst victims of narcissistic abuse who give so much of their power to the narcissist in their lives. Our job is to get the power back and learn how to protect oneself on a psychic level to prevent further leakage of life-force energy.
I feel my work is very down to earth and most people respond very well to these techniques. It is not considered woo woo or far out, but rather speaks to most people on a soul level.
Although I can't offer my services for free I do offer an affordable package of four one-hour sessions for only $200.00. Credit cards are accepted which gives you the opportunity to make small payments. Most people will exerience a significant shift within those four sessions of personal support. So if finances are an issue, you can be assured that through the process of freeing up stuck emotional energy and clearing your blockages that you will also attract more prosperity into your life. Really you have very little to lose and so much to gain by getting the help you need to move forward in your life.
Sign Up For A Personal Support Session Now!
Another option as an addition to or as an alternative to personal support is our new weekly group support sessions beginning mid October. Find out about these now!
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